Jun13
How Do You Know If He’s Ready for Marriage BEFORE You Get Involved?
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Two very reasonable people might have completely different views on what is at stake in a relationship. He might think that spending a year with someone he has no intention of marrying is cool. You might think it’s selfish. There’s no right and wrong.
What you’re looking for is a method to gauge things about men that they probably don’t even know themselves. I think we all have friends who are in serious relationships – 2 years plus – and still aren’t positive they want to get married. So if you think you can figure out after a few months what a guy doesn’t know after a few years, let me know the trick.
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Filed Under Dating Tips & Advice
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Marc F. Jun 13th 2007 at 11:57 am 1
Susan, I think you’d be best served by telling men very early on that you’re interested in marriage. A man who is seriously marriage minded will not be turned off by a woman who is of a similar mindset. You don’t necessarily have to bring up marriage 5 minutes into the first date, but you can bring it up subtly during the course of the date.
josi Jun 15th 2007 at 12:11 am 2
welcome back evan. we wanna hear about your vacation. post pictures!
Martha Jun 16th 2007 at 12:24 am 3
Susan,
Even men who are interested in being married might not thing you are in the running to be his future wife, so what good does it do early on to even talk about it? And don’t think getting married means it’s for keeps either. I was in a luke warm marriage and am now divorced. And he really wanted to marry me. We made it four years. Then it was up in smoke. And there are guys out there that will play along just to get what they want and then just move on and say things like, “I just need some space” when what they really mean is, it’s been nice, but I’m feeling a commitment coming on and I don’t want to have to hurt your feelings. But the sex was great, the meals wonderful, and I really enjoyed your company. Next.
There just are no guarantees. Any sign of neediness or desperation and you’ve blown it. I’ve been a straight shooter all my life, almost married three times before I was 45 and then I really did it. Back in the single life now, all I can say is that it’s at least on my terms, and you have to stay true to yourself. You’re not for sale.
How Do You Know If He’s Ready for Marriage BEFORE You Get Involved? « Veronica’s Lore Jun 16th 2007 at 08:44 am 4
[...] Source here… [...]
Internet Dating Advice Mar 3rd 2008 at 12:54 am 5
Some things to consider:
- Has he been married before and if yes, why and how did his marriage end
- His current situation (whether he has kids, at which point in his career he is, etc.)
- His age (30 to 40 year olds who has never been married are more likely to consider marriage than a 20 to 30 y.o or a 50 y.o. who has never been married)
and many more factors that can somewhat give insight on whether he is at a point in his life where he is seriously looking to have a family
Tiffany Sep 29th 2008 at 04:37 pm 6
You really need to look for the signs like Evan says! If you rush n too fast it will scar him. Men are finiky creatures you have to do things at the right time or you’ll blowthe whole relationship. The funny thing is they may say they are not ready for a commitment but if you notice they are always up for the sex!!! Protect your emotions and find out in a discrete fasion what he is ready for!
Leslie Nov 16th 2008 at 08:28 pm 7
With internet dating I think it is a lot easier to ask these questions and screen early on. Though individuals are sometimes ambiguous with answers, generally speaking those who say they want marriage and children and indicate that they are at a time in their life when they are ready to settle down, are indeed ready to settle down with the right person. If you are both at a place in your lives where you know what you want and share similar goals and values I don’t think if takes long into dating to decide whether there is a chance for the development of a long-term relationship with the potential for marriage. That doesn’t mean the two individuals would become engaged right away, or that difficulties won’t prevent their relationship from enduring but being on the same page and being honest with each other as far as what you are both looking for and communicating along the way can be a great way to avoid wasting time, and help build a solid foundation for marriage.