Comments on: My Boyfriend Doesn’t Want to Have Sex With Me! http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/ Because who knows more about dating than a guy who's still dating? Wed, 07 Jan 2009 10:51:21 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7 hourly 1 By: missy http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-19815 missy Mon, 29 Dec 2008 19:07:26 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-19815 Hmmm interesting comments. I have been going out if you can call it that, with my boyfriend for 5 months. He is well know for being a bit of a lad and i know he has slept with more women that i care to think about !!! That is everyone except me !!! I am at the stage now where i dont sleep over at his and when i drop him off after a night out its a case of a peck on the lips and thats it !!! If i confront him he says he has a lot of problems at the moment (hes out of work, skint, in debt etc) and i understand that but how does that stop him from wanting any intamacy with me. I am starting to feel like the most unattractive person in the world ( Im not by the way). He says he loves me to bits and always wants to spend his time with me, but as far as passion is concerned !!! Thing is its getting worse cos i have not stopped trying and am too scared to go near him. When we are at his house, we even sit on seerate settees. Someone tell me im not going mad and that this guy is taking the p*** . I am so hurt and confused !!! Hmmm interesting comments. I have been going out if you can call it that, with my boyfriend for 5 months. He is well know for being a bit of a lad and i know he has slept with more women that i care to think about !!! That is everyone except me !!! I am at the stage now where i dont sleep over at his and when i drop him off after a night out its a case of a peck on the lips and thats it !!! If i confront him he says he has a lot of problems at the moment (hes out of work, skint, in debt etc) and i understand that but how does that stop him from wanting any intamacy with me. I am starting to feel like the most unattractive person in the world ( Im not by the way). He says he loves me to bits and always wants to spend his time with me, but as far as passion is concerned !!! Thing is its getting worse cos i have not stopped trying and am too scared to go near him. When we are at his house, we even sit on seerate settees. Someone tell me im not going mad and that this guy is taking the p*** . I am so hurt and confused !!!

]]> By: Seductress Within http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-19352 Seductress Within Tue, 16 Dec 2008 18:59:00 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-19352 Virgin, Women spend years and years trying to help, fix, figure out, and change men. The best piece of advice I can give you is to accept things for what they are. It is what it is. Don't hang on to this boy because you're afraid to be alone or find someone else. Don't try to fix this problem so that you can feel loved or forgiven for turning him down before. Have you thought about breaking up with him? If his reason for not having sex with you is that you turned him down on your second date (if that is even the truth) tells you all you need to know. He's immature, selfish, and unloving by trying to make you feel guilty and bad for honoring yourself. Don't be in a hurry to loose your virginity and choose very carefully who that person will be. This boy isn't "scarred" because you turned him down. You did what was right for you. Maybe he isn't for you. Virgin, Women spend years and years trying to help, fix, figure out, and change men.
The best piece of advice I can give you is to accept things for what they are. It is what it is. Don’t hang on to this boy because you’re afraid to be alone or find someone else.
Don’t try to fix this problem so that you can feel loved or forgiven for turning him down before.

Have you thought about breaking up with him?

If his reason for not having sex with you is that you turned him down on your second date (if that is even the truth) tells you all you need to know. He’s immature, selfish, and unloving by trying to make you feel guilty and bad for honoring yourself.

Don’t be in a hurry to loose your virginity and choose very carefully who that person will be. This boy isn’t “scarred” because you turned him down. You did what was right for you. Maybe he isn’t for you.

]]> By: Karl R http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-19312 Karl R Mon, 15 Dec 2008 17:45:07 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-19312 <b>Virgin,</b> (#23) I have several immediate thoughts about your situation. <b>#1</b> This boy is <i>not</i> your boyfriend. He doesn't want to have sex with you, and he doesn't want to be friends. So unless you're using some bizarre definition of the word, he's not your boyfriend. <b>#2</b> You will have thousands of opportunities to lose your virginity. You decided to pass on one opportunity. <b>#3</b> Your ex-boyfriend didn't respect your decision to not have sex on the second date. I wouldn't have sex with anyone who doesn't respect my right to say "no". <b>#4</b> He won't have sex with you because you said "no" to him once. This means he's carrying a grudge ... and a big enough grudge to overlook his sex drive. I wouldn't have sex with someone who carried a grudge like that, and I certainly wouldn't stay in a relationship with someone who carried a grudge like that. One of the best reasons to avoid having sex with someone on the first few dates is so you can find out whether they respect you (are mature, etc) before you have sex with them. You've now discovered two excellent reasons not to have sex with him. Move on to someone else. <b>#5</b> If he does have sex with you, he will just be using you for the fun of sex and so he can lose his virginity. Then again, it sounds like you'd be using him for the exact same thing. <b>#6</b> Viagra won't do a thing. Viagra helps men who <i>want</i> to have sex with a woman, but are physically unable to. Your ex-boyfriend <i>does't want</i> to have sex with you. That's a big difference. <b>#7</b> I don't think he's frigid. I think he's just doesn't want to have sex with <i>you.</i> <b>#8</b> You can't "fix" him (at least not in the way that you meant it). Think about someone truly dislike. Now think about how they could "fix" you so you would like them. It sounds silly, right? There's nothing to "fix" with your ex-boyfriend. Move on and find another guy (preferably one that respects you and is a little more mature, but that's ultimately your decision). <b>#9</b> Your situation doesn't sound "really weird". Your ex-boyfriend sounds immature, but that's pretty normal for teenagers. You can either drive yourself crazy with this situation, or you can let go and walk away. Based on your description, this boy isn't worth going crazy over. Virgin, (#23)

I have several immediate thoughts about your situation.

#1 This boy is not your boyfriend. He doesn’t want to have sex with you, and he doesn’t want to be friends. So unless you’re using some bizarre definition of the word, he’s not your boyfriend.

#2 You will have thousands of opportunities to lose your virginity. You decided to pass on one opportunity.

#3 Your ex-boyfriend didn’t respect your decision to not have sex on the second date. I wouldn’t have sex with anyone who doesn’t respect my right to say “no”.

#4 He won’t have sex with you because you said “no” to him once. This means he’s carrying a grudge … and a big enough grudge to overlook his sex drive. I wouldn’t have sex with someone who carried a grudge like that, and I certainly wouldn’t stay in a relationship with someone who carried a grudge like that.

One of the best reasons to avoid having sex with someone on the first few dates is so you can find out whether they respect you (are mature, etc) before you have sex with them. You’ve now discovered two excellent reasons not to have sex with him. Move on to someone else.

#5 If he does have sex with you, he will just be using you for the fun of sex and so he can lose his virginity. Then again, it sounds like you’d be using him for the exact same thing.

#6 Viagra won’t do a thing. Viagra helps men who want to have sex with a woman, but are physically unable to. Your ex-boyfriend does’t want to have sex with you. That’s a big difference.

#7 I don’t think he’s frigid. I think he’s just doesn’t want to have sex with you.

#8 You can’t “fix” him (at least not in the way that you meant it). Think about someone truly dislike. Now think about how they could “fix” you so you would like them. It sounds silly, right? There’s nothing to “fix” with your ex-boyfriend. Move on and find another guy (preferably one that respects you and is a little more mature, but that’s ultimately your decision).

#9 Your situation doesn’t sound “really weird”. Your ex-boyfriend sounds immature, but that’s pretty normal for teenagers.

You can either drive yourself crazy with this situation, or you can let go and walk away. Based on your description, this boy isn’t worth going crazy over.

]]> By: Virgin http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-19283 Virgin Mon, 15 Dec 2008 04:34:03 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-19283 what about in teenagers? i confronted my boyfriend about not trying to initiate sex or respond when i initiate it. He said that he wouldnt have sex with me because i rejected him the first time he asked for it, (on the second date). He is a virgin. Ive asked him if he wants to be friends and he said no. i think for a teenage boy this is really weird and frustrating. Im ready to lose my V’s now (5 months since then), and he won’t because i didnt want it back then, as if ive lost my opportunity. is he frigid? and how do i fix it? would viagra actually work? what about in teenagers? i confronted my boyfriend about not trying to initiate sex or respond when i initiate it.
He said that he wouldnt have sex with me because i rejected him the first time he asked for it, (on the second date). He is a virgin.

Ive asked him if he wants to be friends and he said no.
i think for a teenage boy this is really weird and frustrating. Im ready to lose my V’s now (5 months since then), and he won’t because i didnt want it back then, as if ive lost my opportunity.

is he frigid? and how do i fix it? would viagra actually work?

]]> By: vegemite http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-14541 vegemite Fri, 19 Sep 2008 11:54:22 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-14541 i don't know what the go is maybe you guys can shed some light onto the suitation... I met a guy through a mate and we hit it off instantly. He was affectionate, caring sent me messages took me to work, I always caught him smiling at me, met his family the whole thing. Then out of the blue he acts cold, I can't get anythign out of him so i speak to his bestmate (they mate who introduced us to each other) and i find out by him that hes not ready for a relationship and doesn't wnat to hurt my feelings. So i confront him and even then he doesn't say much, so i make a decesion and i brake up with him. Afterwards he invites me to all these things and even buys me ice-cream. When i see him a week later as he wanted to make me dinner he acts as if we are still going out. Also when i'm with male friends he gets jelous and makes my mates know that he is there. Within a few weeks after we break up he tells me about these girls he has. (like he on a rebound) I needed to get over him so i toldhim i needed time to get my feelings sorted out and to get over him. Hes best mate and i are still friends and so I see him often. Now they live togethere and i have given myself a few months of getting over him but now he won't even speak to me and last time i saw him when i went to our mutual mates place he was "sleeping" and the whole time woundn't speak to me and whenever he knows im somewhere he avoids the place... Any insight as to what on earth went on? Thanx. i don’t know what the go is maybe you guys can shed some light onto the suitation… I met a guy through a mate and we hit it off instantly. He was affectionate, caring sent me messages took me to work, I always caught him smiling at me, met his family the whole thing. Then out of the blue he acts cold, I can’t get anythign out of him so i speak to his bestmate (they mate who introduced us to each other) and i find out by him that hes not ready for a relationship and doesn’t wnat to hurt my feelings. So i confront him and even then he doesn’t say much, so i make a decesion and i brake up with him. Afterwards he invites me to all these things and even buys me ice-cream. When i see him a week later as he wanted to make me dinner he acts as if we are still going out. Also when i’m with male friends he gets jelous and makes my mates know that he is there. Within a few weeks after we break up he tells me about these girls he has. (like he on a rebound) I needed to get over him so i toldhim i needed time to get my feelings sorted out and to get over him. Hes best mate and i are still friends and so I see him often. Now they live togethere and i have given myself a few months of getting over him but now he won’t even speak to me and last time i saw him when i went to our mutual mates place he was “sleeping” and the whole time woundn’t speak to me and whenever he knows im somewhere he avoids the place… Any insight as to what on earth went on? Thanx.

]]> By: hunter http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-11895 hunter Sun, 03 Aug 2008 06:24:31 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-11895 ...they are not always, gay/depressed...some are uninformed, some have low self esteem/no self respect, that is still not your problem... …they are not always, gay/depressed…some are uninformed, some have low self esteem/no self respect, that is still not your problem…

]]> By: hunter http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-11894 hunter Sun, 03 Aug 2008 06:19:30 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-11894 on post #19 I know there are many, many, guys that don't know how to ask for sex, herds of men that don't know how to seduce a woman. Isn't that why women call them, "nice guys/good boys?" on post #19

I know there are many, many, guys that don’t know how to ask for sex, herds of men that don’t know how to seduce a woman. Isn’t that why women call them, “nice guys/good boys?”

]]> By: Bryce http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-11872 Bryce Sat, 02 Aug 2008 20:34:05 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-11872 My boyfriend and I have been dating for 7 months and he doesn't want to have sex with me either. At first I liked it because its hard to find a gay guy who isn't all about sex. But after 7 months and he still won't do it with me I am starting to wonder about him....I know he is gay because I have seen him get off to his porn and how he gets grossed out by girls but......I don't know...I started thinking it was me maybe I just wasn't hot enough....so I started dieting and exercised everyday....now I exercise twice a day.....and I am in really good shape.....so I don't know....maybe its because I have a really good paying job and he doesn't do anything but stay at home....I am starting to think he is depressed. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 7 months and he doesn’t want to have sex with me either. At first I liked it because its hard to find a gay guy who isn’t all about sex. But after 7 months and he still won’t do it with me I am starting to wonder about him….I know he is gay because I have seen him get off to his porn and how he gets grossed out by girls but……I don’t know…I started thinking it was me maybe I just wasn’t hot enough….so I started dieting and exercised everyday….now I exercise twice a day…..and I am in really good shape…..so I don’t know….maybe its because I have a really good paying job and he doesn’t do anything but stay at home….I am starting to think he is depressed.

]]> By: ktbabygurl http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-11870 ktbabygurl Sat, 02 Aug 2008 20:06:27 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-11870 wow that sounds awful. but it looks like that relatinship was over a few months ago. i hope you've gotten rid of him by now. wow that sounds awful. but it looks like that relatinship was over a few months ago. i hope you’ve gotten rid of him by now.

]]> By: Kelley http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/comment-page-1/#comment-8815 Kelley Fri, 06 Jun 2008 14:37:39 +0000 http://www.advicefromasingledatingexpert.com/my-boyfriend-doesnt-want-to-have-sex-with-me/#comment-8815 Well my boyfriend who has lived with me for almost 9 months now has not had sex w/me for 49 days. Oh at first it was all the time, then in January it stopped, said it was all his fault, psychological, etc. I was maybe having it once a month, but now nothing. I am really at my wits end, in fact at times I really don't like him. He says he loves me but never ever shows it. It looks like I will be dumping him. Well my boyfriend who has lived with me for almost 9 months now has not had sex w/me for 49 days. Oh at first it was all the time, then in January it stopped, said it was all his fault, psychological, etc. I was maybe having it once a month, but now nothing. I am really at my wits end, in fact at times I really don’t like him. He says he loves me but never ever shows it. It looks like I will be dumping him.

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